It’s been just over a month now since we got married and since that day; life has been an absolute whirlwind.
The purchasing of several hundred ovulation sticks, a piss-pot, a thermometer and multi-vitamins has taken place and at the moment, I am currently waking up at 05:00 (EVERY MORNING!!) to take my temperature. This, again, is from S’s research whereby if my temperature spikes it means I am ovulating. Once a pattern is seen, I will then use the ovulation kits.
Once I know an exact time of ovulation (you would think I already know this, but unfortunately I have an odd cycle system), we can then plan for the sperm *shudders*.
With any luck, we hope to conceive early next year and start the New Year with a bang – quite literally.
At the moment, in addition to “official” research, we are also following some other wonderful blogs. Personally, I’m finding that the blogs are useful research also, not to mention words of hope, wisdom, guidance and experience! Many of the blogs are by women who have or are taking part in the same things we are or have done already (take a look at the “Who we follow” pages to find out more).
My current feeling towards the whole matter is sheer excitement. Sure, I’m scared and anxious as hell (can we really afford a baby?) but at the same time; having a little sprog – our own little sprog – will create whole new feelings that I’ve probably never felt in my life. As I said, I am excited… very very excited.
The actual day cannot come any sooner and I’m sure that my emotions will change the closer we get to actually doing “it”. But what I do know is that I’m ready.
Many years ago, if you would have said to me that I would be having my very own child in my 20’s I would have laughed. Laughed hard.
See, when I was younger (when I say young, I mean late teens) I never had the desire to have children. I wouldn’t coo or go “aww” at the sight of a child. Sure, they were cute, but that’s it. If one was heading my way I would conveniently go get a glass of water. I didn’t really get on with them and in some cases, they were awful little creatures that dribbled and screamed at pitches that broke glass. No thank you. Now, I’m not saying I didn’t like children, it simply wasn’t something that I desired.
There’s no reason I felt this way. I had a very loving up-bringing, etc. etc. I grew up in an area of Brighton whereby it was normal to have children young, but it’s not as if I was rebelling against my surroundings and refusing to “conform” (yes, I studied A-Level Sociology).
Perhaps, I was unintentionally following in my mums’ footsteps (me and my mum are very alike) as I vaguely remember my mum saying she had the same beliefs re children when she was young. I’ll never know.
What I do know though; is that since meeting S, opinions and choices in life have now changed. Choices and decisions that I thought were made and set in stone many years ago have now changed – this now includes children. I never asked for anything to change when I met S, nor did she want anything in me to change, it just did… and I think I like it.
I now want children… Bugger.