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Sleeping Better, Longer and Deeper with TEMPUR® [AD]
I’ve not always had the greatest relationship with sleep. Being a shift worker for over ten years my sleep pattern has always been erratic. In 2015, when I became a ...
Lesbemums is an award-winning LGBT Family, Travel and Lifestyle blog created by Kate & Sharon.
Established in 2012, Kate & Sharon share what it’s like to be an LGBTQ family, as well as their adventures around the UK and beyond.
![[AD] I've not always had the greatest relationship with sleep. Being a shift worker for over ten years my sleep pattern has always been erratic. In 2015, when I became a parent, I forgot what a decent nights sleep truly felt like. More recently, when COVID 19 hit, my anxiety levels increased so dramatically, that sleep was sometimes a thing of the past. As a result, I've suffered with memory issues, as well as changes in my mood and general performance. But we've had enough. To put it simply; I'm tired.
For me, when I get into bed, I want to feel instantly relaxed. I want to have a deep and restful nights sleep, and I want to wake up feeling refreshed. During the pandemic this didn't feel like an option. Not only would I wake in the night or regularly toss and turn (which would wake Sharon too!) but I would wake up with aches and pains in my back. Because of this, bed time was not often something I would look forward to.
With this, we've decided to invest in our sleep environment recently. As well as taking steps to make sure we're able to wind down at the end of the day, things like our pillows have recently had a massive upgrade thanks to the folks at @TEMPUR_UK who recently got in touch.
For decades, #Tempur has been in a league of its own when it comes to a comfortable nights sleep - from their award-winning mattresses and pillows to their sofa beds and bed-time accessories. The secret behind how TEMPUR® material works is complex (NASA complex!), but what it does is simple; it helps you sleep better, longer, and deeper.
Our review of their Comfort Cloud Pillow is now live over on the blog. If you’re thinking about investing in a better, longer and deeper nights sleep, check it out!
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![Is anyone else struggling to get back into the routine after Summer? Yeah us too. We love having some sort of a routine as it means we don't have to *think* as much but we've been completely thrown into the deep end this year. Our school calendar is already filling up through no fault of our own.
Not only have T's school changed their start times (meaning he's in earlier now 😫) but they've scrapped ALL restrictions. 😡
❌ No one-way systems.
❌ No need for masks.
❌ No staggered start times or pick-ups.
Let me tell you, the mornings can be STRESSFUL but this is another level.
If that wasn't enough, T's just been invited to his first school birthday party AND his first school trip (which is weird to say considering he's already been at school for two years - COVID eh?).
All of this in the first two weeks!
This also means I've just remembered how socially awkward I am around other parents. I've been able to hide behind a mask, and sometimes even sunglasses as well, for two years... Now I'm going to have to... Talk.
I'm absolutely sh*tting it.
Anyone else?
[This gorgeous 🌈 calendar behind me was kindly sent to us as a gift from @betsybenn]
[ID: A picture of Kate taken from the nose up. Kate's eyes are wide open, looking at the camera. Her hair is styled into a side mohawk. Behind her is a rainbow calendar - made up of four pieces of card spread across the wall - that looks like a paint colour chart.]](https://i0.wp.com/lesbemums.com/wp-content/uploads/sb-instagram-feed-images/241857331_2944456562549562_3754012535496075263_nfull.jpg?ssl=1)
![This morning after school drop off I surrounded myself with good people and good food. I saw the washing pile, pressed the f*ck it button and vanished to @shelterhallmarket for brunch. I even had brunch pudding. How could I not with pastries like this?
If the last two years have taught me anything, it's being around people who get me and to prioritise what's truly important.
Like good pastry.
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![Gosh, I don't think we've ever had quite the response like the one we had for our last post. Thank you to everyone who engaged with it and shared it, as well as those who shared their own experiences. Some not only witnessing "TSG" first hand, even today, but others admitting their own mistakes when they were young. Accountability is vital. Yes, it's bloody embarrassing, but it's what moves us forward. It's part of any future change that we want.
Some more private messages asked us how we deal with it when we hear it, especially if T is with us, and to be honest; it varies. During the example we gave, I said nothing. Not only because the group was large and I wasn't in the right mindset to have - let's face it - a debate / argument, but T hadn't heard it and I didn't want to kill his vibe by mentioning it. Other times, however, I have challenged people. Sometimes I've been the only one to say something! I've also sometimes had to take T to one side and explain what just happened and why. It really does vary depending on the situation, which is why it's so important that allies do the work also. It can't be left to those who it directly affects to do the work, because sometimes we're just too damn tired.
As an LGBTQ family, education is incredibly important to us - especially as T is now in the school system. We're not naïve to think that he won't witness homophobic language or even experience it himself, but the more we can do to encourage others to have those conversations the more likely it'll be that T won't be the only person saying something when it does happen. I cannot stress the importance of not just waiting until you hear it or hoping that teachers will address it at school. Talk about it now. Before they hear it, before they SAY it. Be proactive, not reactive. Equip them with the knowledge of understanding it, what to do and how to challenge it, because it needs to be challenged and eradicated. It's not an "adult conversation" for later on, it's a "now conversation".
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![[CW: Homophobic language] Last week, we were queuing for some food and I saw two boys playing around with some drinks they'd collected. They were no more than 7 or 8 and were pretending that there were different liquids in their drink; ranging from slime to potions. One boy then said "I have wee in my drink" to which the other boy said "That's so Gay".
I'll let that sink in.
They were 7/8 years old.
I won't remind you what year it is, because it was unacceptable in the 90's and 00's too but with such an increase in visibility recently I thought we were over this by now, but clearly not. Although they were young, my heart instantly skipped a beat and my hairs stood up on end. My eyes then followed them back to where their family was. Firstly to make sure we weren't in any danger, but also with curiosity to see whether I could work out the main culprit. It was no good.
That's the thing about homophobia - it's so ingrained in our langauge that people of all ages still choose to say "TSG" rather than "rubbish", "gross" or "silly". It then gets passed down like an heirloom unless they're taught otherwise. It so sad that slurs still come more naturally, and our work revolves around constantly undoing that, than happier things like our history and culture.
I'm sure (read: hopeful) the boys and their families aren't raging homophobes, but langauge matters and I cannot express more how important it is to have conversations with your children about langauge. It matters. Don't just assume they don't know or say "it" themselves just because you don't. For one of the boys in my story, it might have been the first time they'd heard the phrase, but after hearing it from his friend (maybe even his brother) he may now go on to say it until told otherwise. If he's ever told otherwise!
Langauge is what shapes our society. It's the difference between feeling safe and being safe, and right now we - as a community - don't always feel safe, and it's because of scenarios like this.
Langauge matters.
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