My Son… Thank You

My Dearest,

As you snuggle deeper into my arms for what feels like the last time, I want to take this time to thank you. To thank you for the most amazing year. It’s been incredible.

Part of me knew it would be – I’ve been waiting for you for so long – but the other part of me was quite anxious. Will I be good enough? Will I know what to do once we’re left alone? Will you know what to do?

I’m still learning. We’re still learning.

It wasn’t long before we got into the swing of things. By 7:00am most days we were alone. Alone for 12 hours some days. We shared everything together. We went everywhere together. It was very rare for us to be apart. You wouldn’t allow it. But that was fine. I learnt that that’s what you needed, and who was I to tell you otherwise?

It’s been a journey and a half, son. We’ve been through a lot. I’ve fed you. I’ve carried you in more ways than one. Loved you unconditionally. The latter was easy.

Over the past year you’ve proved I had so much more love to give when I thought all of it was already given to your mama. You’ve proved I had more strength, more energy. More everything. I don’t know how or where, but you found it. You’ve pushed me past limits no one has ever taken me, and at times broken me. Thank you.

Now the more difficult part begins. We have to go our separate ways for a while. It won’t be for long. Trust me. I won’t allow it. My head will be at work, sometimes, but my heart will be with you, always.

No matter how long this stage lasts, remember this, I will never forget this past year and I hope you feel the same.

Thank you, sweetheart. I love you.

Mummy