LGBT History Month – Featured Families: MummyMumma

Flowing nicely into our fifth featured family is Katie and Kirsty from MummyMumma. Katie and Kirsty are new in our blogroll list but we’re so glad that we do follow them, it’s a treat reading about their son Joseph.

What I’m loving the most about this feature is the variety in where our families come from. Our previous family were from Austrailia, now it’s Scotland!

Who are you?

We are Katie (30) and Kirsty (32) and we live in Glasgow, Scotland.

How long have you been together?

We have been together for 6 years – lived together for 5 and a half, been engaged for 2 and been parents for almost 1.

Where did you meet?

We met in a gay club in Glasgow. We chatted and swapped numbers then met a couple of days later for a drink. Pretty much from that day on we have been inseparable!!

Do you have any children?

We have one gorgeous baby boy, Joseph, who was born 10th February 2015. Katie carried Joseph, who was conceived after our first round of IVF at a private clinic, using donor sperm.

What’s the best thing about being a parent / becoming a parent?

Kirsty – For me, the best thing about the whole process of becoming parent was creating a life with the person I love.

Katie – watching Joseph change and grow and learn new things is completely magical. He surprises me every single day and I can’t believe that Kirsty and I made him! I am so proud of him and I am excited to see the person he becomes. The unconditional, all-consuming love I have for him overwhelms me on a daily basis and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

What challenges, if any, have you faced as a same-sex family? / What challenges are you afraid of?

Since starting the whole process, we have been faced with a lot of questions. We have always been very open with anyone who asks, but the “so who’s the father? What does he look like?” questions can get tiring. Some people feel that they can to ask us very intimate and personal questions and it still amazes me how many people refer to our donor as Joseph’s “dad” !! Luckily, we have mostly been met with positivity when we discuss our family.

As parents, we are worried about the questions Joseph will face as he grows up and goes to school. We hope that we can give Joseph the confidence, identity and strength of mind to answer any questions without getting upset, offended or frustrated.

Has it been easy to teach your children about diversity? / How will you teach diversity?

We hope that diversity is not something we will need to teach. We hope that by surrounding Joseph with diversity in his everyday life; through books, friends, discussion, toys, etc, it will be something that does not need to be explicitly ‘taught’. Celebrating diversity is an important part of our family life.

What would be your message to a young person “coming out” today?

Coming out is tough. It can be messy and upsetting and sometimes seems never-ending. But it is something that you will get through!

Keep your head up, surround yourself with positivity and people who make you happy. You are part of an amazing community. Always, always be proud of who you are.

What would be your message to a couple starting out on the TTC journey?

Oh wow. Ok, the journey can be long and hard and emotional and so so draining. But with every low, there will be a high. With every tear of sadness, there will be a tear of overwhelming joy. It’s tough, but incredibly worth it in the end.

What does LGBT History mean to you?

For us, LGBT History month is a time to reflect. It is a time to remember and celebrate the people who have fought endlessly for the rights we enjoy today. It is also a time to realise that the fight is not over. We still have so far to go.

Where can we find you?

Twitter – @mummymumma

Instagram – @mummymumma1

Blog – www.mummymumma.wordpress.com

This post is part of a month long celebration for LGBT history month. If you’d like to get involved, tweet using the hashtag #LGBTHM or find one of your local LGBT groups on Facebook and find out how they’re celebrating LGBT History Month. 

LGBT History Month – Featured Families: 2AussieMummas

We’ve followed 2AussieMummas since day one, before we even began trying, so it’s a real treat to have them talk to us and feature for LGBT History month.

Fourth in our featured families segment, I introduce Tara from Austrailia!

Who are you?

My name is Tara, 30+ Australian mother, wife, blogger-on-hiatus.

How long have you been with your partner?

We just celebrated Seven years of being together this past January. Married for five years this coming May.

Where did you meet?

We met in a most cliché way! I was visiting a friend out of town for one night only and planning a big move up the coast. My friend took me out to the local gay pub where Diana Anaid was playing and the rest is history!

How many children do you have? How old are they?

We have one three and a half year old son that my wife carried.

What’s the best thing about being a parent?

There is so much. The laughs, giggles, hugs! Those moments where my son will take my face in his hands and say something profound and for those few moments the world is perfect. Running through the sprinkler together on a summer day. Seeing him with his grandparents. I love the small moments, the moments that I know he will think back on later in life and know he is loved.

What challenges, if any, have you faced as a same sex family?

We are very very lucky. We have never actually had to deal with negativity directly. Both of our families are supportive and love us and the fact that we are lesbians isn’t even a thing. We have a diverse circle of friends, and live in an area that is pretty open minded.

The times I have felt disheartened and reminded of the challenges we face as a family have been when I allow current political climate and the lack of marriage equality in Australia etc to get to me. We have come so far but there is still so far to go.

Has it been easy to teach your children about diversity? Have they encountered any problems? If so, how did you react?

We make a point to teach our son of the amazing diversity that surrounds him. At this stage, through age appropriate conversations and the books we have chosen for him.

Regarding him encountering any problems, we have been lucky here also. Being only three and a half, he and his peers aren’t really concerned with gender and gender roles yet. He has been asked about having two mums or not having a dad and he just answers in a very matter of fact way that he only has a Mummy and a Mum. I have been present when this occurs and I feel that it’s best to stand back and allow him to handle it as long as he feels that he can.

If someone was to bully him about having two mums I would step in if he needed me and it would open a new dialogue for us as a family. I have my fingers crossed that doesn’t happen any time soon.

What would be your message to a young person “coming out” today?

Read as much as you can, connect safely with people online, join a group, see a talk to people you trust.

Depending on your family and where you live you may experience little to no issues with coming out. Try and gauge that first and if you aren’t in a safe environment, seek help from someone like a counsellor or friend. Don’t keep it locked away, there is nothing wrong with you! Utilise all the amazing information and people that are out there! It may be a scary thing for you personally but the world is ready for you!

What would be your message to a couple starting out on the TTC journey?

Hold on to your hats! HAHA!

No really, it’s the most insane ride you will ever take. Before you even start, get your general health in order and get your reproductive health checked. You could end up having to waste time when you decide to actually start if not. We got set back quite a bit after finding that my wife needed her chicken pox vaccination and couldn’t fall pregnant for a while after, it was so disappointing!

Also, your relationship. No one ever tells you what a toll it takes! People tell you TTC is hard. Well it is… But that’s truly only the start. Be prepared for your relationship to be tested and retested more times than will be comfortable. Make sure to always make time for your partner. Make sure she always knows she is loved. And communication, communication, communication!

How about those especially worried about persecution?

This is a tough one. I have heard about people living in towns where they were the only gay family and were quite persecuted or having families that did not accept their partner or children their partner carried. For me, this would not have been acceptable and to be honest, if we had lived in a town where we were afraid of persecution we would have figured out a way to move before starting a family.

As for family, I would make a choice between my wife and our son and the people that could not love us. It sounds a little black and white but for me happiness and love is the goal, I could not live an unhappy life where my family was unloved.

What does LGBT History mean to you?

I am so grateful to those that have come before me. The men and women that have fought, struggled and died for us to be able to live in a world where gay people can now live open and happy lives in so many parts of the world.

I also feel that we shouldn’t stop here and just be grateful. We should carry the torch that has eben passed to us. Keep making history, keep educating, keep fighting for equality.

Where can we find you?

Twitter: @2aussiemammas

Blog: http://2aussiemammas.blogspot.com.au/ (blog currently inactive, but still may have some useful info)

This post is part of a month long celebration for LGBT history month. If you’d like to get involved, tweet using the hashtag #LGBTHM or find one of your local LGBT groups on Facebook and find out how they’re celebrating LGBT History Month. 

LGBT History Month – Featured Families: 2Brides2Mums.

Our third Featured Family segment features 2brides2mums. Sarah from the blog talks about her wife and their up and coming bundle of joy! Congratulations, ladies!

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Who are you?

We are Sarah (aged 31) and Lauren (soon to be 30!), a married lesbian couple from Birmingham, UK.
Sarah is a manager for a luxury lifestyle brand and Lauren is an amazing midwife. 
When we aren’t working we love travelling (we’ve visted ten countries in ten years!) and food! Sarah is vegan and Lauren is vegetarian – and an amazing cook. Going out for meals is one of our favourite things ever!

How long have you been together?

This year we will have been together for twelve years in September, and married for three years in July.
Where did you meet?

We met in our home town of Birmingham aged 18 and 19. We were both just out of relationships and given each others number by a mutual friend. We met up for a drink one evening and the rest, as they say, is history!
We became a couple two weeks later, and two years later I moved to Leeds where Lauren was at university, to move in with her into a tiny, rainbow coloured flat!
We bought our house in Birmingham after six years together, and added a tiny puppy to the mix! Willow is a tiny cross breed who has been excellent practice for human babies!
We got engaged in Brighton, one of our favourite places in the world, with Lauren organising for the hotel we were staying at to fill our room with rose petals, champagne, and a huge bubble bath for our return.  We married in 2013 in Birmingham – the absolute best day of our lives, then after spending a year exploring the world a little more, we began fertility treatment. Phew!
Do you have any children?

Our little boy (our first child) is due in June this year!
What’s the best thing about becoming a parent?

We are lucky to have lives filled with so much love – from each other, from our families, from our friends, and we can’t wait to have a child to share that with. We love seeing new places and exploring the world, and we can’t wait to give our little one lots of adventures!
What challenges are you afraid of as a same sex family?

We have probably worried about the same things as any other family – if we’ll be good parents, what school our child will go to in our area etc. During visits to our fertility clinic, scan appointments, midwife appointments, even trips to places like Mamas & Papas and The Baby Show, we have been treated the same as any other couple, so it’s hard to imagine a scenario where we are treated differently for being same sex parents. We have discussed that we want our child to be aware of different family units, and also about donor conception (which we will adapt to be age appropriate).
How will you teach diversity to your child?

We are lucky that our family and friends contain lots of positive examples of diversity – single mums, single dads, multi racial families, adoptive parents, disabilities, and same sex parents. We want our child to be open minded, without prejudice, and to judge people by character not circumstance. Its important to us that our child knows that their ‘normal’ is just that – theirs, and that its ok that others ‘normal’ may be different from their own.
What would be your message to a young person “coming out” today?

Be yourself. It sounds simple and cliche, but it is honestly the thing that will make you happiest, most free, and will attract the most genuine people to you. Life is too short to worry about what others think of you!
What would be your message to a couple starting out on the TTC journey?

Every couple is different, but for us , it was important not to rush into treatmnet despite being eager to start a family – we had been together ten years when we began our journey, as we wanted to have our own home, be married, and have had lots of baby-free holidays first!
We also wanted to ensure we had saved enough money – fertility treatment is expensive, with lots of hidden costs, and babies arent cheap either! Like most people on the TTC journey we had numerous draw backs and it’s not not to be disheartened or stressed by it. We tried to always remember our baby would come when it was supposed to, and trust that everything happened for a reason. Our succesful embryo transfer was such a relaxed, peaceful day, and we think this had a positive impact.
What does LGBT History mean to you?
 
I think the thing that strikes us about LGBT history is it never fails to amaze me every time I see examples in media such as YouTube of LGBT history, is how far we have came, and how far there is still to go. When we became a couple, civil partnerships didn’t exist, let alone same sex marriage. We are extremely lucky to live in a safe, tolerant country but are always aware when visiting other countries that this is not the case everywhere, and even in the UK we are occasionally disappointed by attitudes to same sex couples, particularly around marriage and parenting. It is brilliant how the laws have changed to give us equal opportunities, and even better to see attitudes starting to reflect this too.
Where can we find you? 

We are on Twitter at @2brides2mums, Instagram at @SarahLovesL and @LaurenNune, and our blog is 2bridesto2mummies.blogspot.com.
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This post is part of a month long celebration for LGBT history month. If you’d like to get involved, tweet using the hashtag #LGBTHM or find one of your local LGBT groups on Facebook and find out how they’re celebrating LGBT History Month. 


LGBT History Month – Featured Families: Adopting Mummy

Our second Featured Family segment features Adopting Mummy, and she talks about her family and how tough TTC was. 

We’ve followed Adopting Mummy through quite a tough TTC journey, and then their adopting journey. We’re lucky enough now to call them our friends.
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1) Who are you?

We are adopting mummy and wife. We live in the UK.

2) How long have you been together?

Well over a decade now.

3) Where did you meet?

Randomly, in a club. A mutual friend introduced us.

4) How many children do you have?

2

5) What’s the best thing about being a parent?

Watching our children grow in every way that they do. Our little people are completely different to the ones that came home.

6) What challenges, if any, have you faced as a same-sex family?

No real challenges here (yet). People assume that our kids have a dad but the kids correct them. We were worried about school but no one seemed to bat an eye-lid!

7) Has it been easy to teach your children about diversity? Have they encountered any problems?

We have lots of books that talk about differences in people and family structures and are very open with both of our children. They will now ask us pretty much anything because they know that we’ll answer them as honestly as we can.

8) What would be your message to a young person “coming out” today?

You may feel as though you’re alone but you are far from it. Millions of us have worked towards where we are now, be true to yourself and don’t make excuses for people who may treat you badly. If someone doesn’t come around within a few weeks/months, don’t let that drag you down.

9) What would be your message to a couple starting out on the TTC journey?

Don’t let it come between you. We tried to conceive for getting on for 3 years and we made that mistake. When we finally realised that it probably wasn’t going to happen for us, it was a relief.

Adoption had been on our radar for over 10 years already so we decided to skip ahead and persue that option instead.

TTC doesn’t work for everyone but it doesn’t mean that you can’t have the family you’ve always wanted, it just means that you may have to look in a different place.

9a) How about those especially worried about persecution?

Some people will never truly accept you for who you are. Make sure that you have a strong support network around you.

10) What does LGBT History mean to you?

I get emotional when I think of how far we’ve come and how many people have lost their lives in one way or another during the fight. If it wasn’t for our collective history, our family wouldn’t exist. Wife and I might not have ever met and we would not have our children. We are who we are because of our history.

11) Where can we find you?

Twitter @AdoptingMummy and the blog is in the bio 🙂

Thank you to Adopting Mummy for sharing. I really enjoyed reading about the determination to find their family. It will no doubt reassure other couples that there are other avenues to explore when creating a family.

This post is part of a month long celebration for LGBT history month. If you’d like to get involved, tweet using the hashtag #LGBTHM or find one of your local LGBT groups on Facebook and find out how they’re celebrating LGBT History Month. 

LGBT History Month – Featured Families: Hound Mamas

As part of LGBT History month I asked several rainbow families whether they would be happy to talk to me about being a same sex family and what LGBT history has done for them.

In the first of our Featured Families segment I’m letting Molly from Hound Mamas talk to you about her family. I’ve followed this blog for a long time and have enjoyed reading about their journey through sad times and good times.

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1) Who are you?

I’m Molly and my wife’s blog name is Catch. We’re both 34 years old and we live in Los Angeles, USA.

2) How long have you been together?

It’s been 10 years since our first date and 7 years since we were legally married. (I never get tired of saying that!)

3) Where did you meet?

Match.com. Seriously.

4) How many children do you have? How old are they?

We have a 6-month old daughter. She’s our one and only.

5) What’s the best thing about being a parent? 

For me, motherhood has been absolutely exhausting but no matter how rough things are, it all melts away when our baby girl reaches out to me and smiles. Her smile makes the exhaustion fade away.

6) What challenges, if any, have you faced as a same-sex family?

We’ve only been parents for 6 months, and we’re fortunate enough to live in a big city where we haven’t had many public challenges as a same-sex family. Even our health care providers have been wonderfully accepting of our family unit. Our struggle was a bit closer to home, actually: My in-laws.

Catch’s parents made numerous comments over the years about how they would never be grandparents. It was like they couldn’t even fathom that Catch and I would or could ever have a baby together. When we decided to start trying to conceive, we agreed to keep them in the dark about our plans because they are very Catholic and conservative, and we worried how they would react to our use of a sperm donor and artificial reproductive technology.

When we got our positive pregnancy test, we told them over the most awkward dinner I have ever experienced—and I’ve been on some very awkward dates, so that’s saying something. They really had no idea what to say to us.

We gave them time to process things. My mother in law was actually the one who came around first. She slowly found her voice and started asking questions about the process and the donor. She would chat with me about pregnancy, and commiserated with me about her own miscarriage experience.

My father in law rarely said anything to me throughout my pregnancy. He remained awkward and uncomfortable until the very end. We had no idea what to expect once our baby girl was born.

That day in the hospital, everything changed. From the moment my father in law laid eyes upon our daughter, he was head over heels in love with her. He actually wouldn’t put her down once he had her in his arms, which caused some trouble because they stayed for 4 hours and I really wanted my baby back! But after all his awkwardness and hesitation, it was such a welcome surprise to see him so smitten with her.

My in laws have had their own challenges. They run in a pretty conservative Catholic circle, and I think it’s been hard for them to find their voice with their friends. It hasn’t been easy for them to talk about their daughter and her wife, and I know it was challenging to explain to their friends that it wasn’t their daughter who carried their grandchild. They have come so far, though, and I am really proud of them. Mostly though, I’m just grateful that they love our daughter with all of the joy and passion you would hope to see from grandparents.

7) Has it been easy to teach your children about diversity? Have they encountered any problems?

Charlotte is a bit young for this, but diversity is going to be a way of life for her. I hope that we can teach her to embrace all the things that make every one of us unique. Of everything we’ll teach her throughout her life, I think that lesson is probably the most important.

8) What would be your message to a young person “coming out” today?

Leap. Do it. Break free of the closet and don’t look back. The people who truly matter will rise to the occasion, even if it takes them some time. Make sure you have a support system in place to help you pick up any broken pieces, and just leap.

9) What would be your message to a couple starting out on the TTC journey?

Have patience—with the process, with each other, and with those around you. Depending on your journey, you may find TTC to be the biggest challenge you’ve faced as a couple. (To which I say HAH—just wait for parenthood!) Remember that the only way out is through, and the only way through is patience.

9a) How about those especially worried about persecution?

You have to be totally comfortable in your own skin before you bring a baby into the world. There’s no hiding once you have a child. You can’t pretend to just be friends when it’s convenient any longer. (I married a Catholic schoolteacher, so that happened on a number of occasions throughout the years when we’d run into my wife’s students.) Having a baby means being unapologetically out. Make sure you have a network of support in place that makes you feel safe and comfortable, and be prepared to stand up for your family if you need to.

10) What does LGBT History mean to you?

Everything. It means everything to me. All of the people who struggled before me have paved the way for me to be married—Something that 15 years ago, I honestly never thought would happen in my lifetime. Even better, our daughter is truly ours. Both of our names are on her birth certificate. I will never take that for granted. We have come so far and I am so proud of our community and its history.

11) Where can we find you?

We blog over at http://houndmamas.wordpress.com/


Thanks to Molly for sharing, it was really interesting to read about the conflict she faced from her family and how she dealt with that. I can’t imagine what it must have been like.

This post is part of a month long celebration for LGBT history month. If you’d like to get involved, tweet using the hashtag #LGBTHM or find one of your local LGBT groups on Facebook and find out how they’re celebrating LGBT History Month. 

9 Month Update

T is 9. Months. Old. 9 MONTHS.

I’ve given up wondering why T isn’t making any effort to move. It’ll simply come when it comes. He’ll move when he wants to / works out how (I hope). He can stand quite happily on edges of sofas and knees so I’ll take that as progress. Plus, I’ve realised that one day he won’t be so small (or so still) so I should really make the most out of it now.

Where he’s not moving, he makes up for in voice and noises. He has a few regulars such as “mamamama” and “babababa” which both go on for a while. I don’t think they’re any relation to words, but they’re definitely sounds he likes making. “Mamamama” he makes more when he’s annoyed or if I’m in the kitchen. Other noises include lip smacking, lip popping, and something that sounds like a motorboat and a raspberry when he blows air through his lips. It’s all very cute.

We had an awesome Christmas. T was truly spoilt by family and friends, and often didn’t know what to do with himself whilst surrounded by toys.


Christmas Day even got a bit overwhelming for him, so much so he had to have a nap half way through opening presents. Christmas dinner, however, was not a problem. He tried a bit of everything and has found a love for turkey.


Weaning is still going well. He has days where he doesn’t eat much and is quite picky, other days he doesn’t stop taking what is offered. He still loves toast and banana, but now also enjoys hard boiled egg.

Since hitting 9 months he really knows to deal with things, such as; how to get things off other things (like the rings off the stacker), how to pull things towards him if something he wants is on it (like a tablecloth to get a plate), or just general search (and destroy), which is my favourite. We got him a ball pit for Christmas, so when I set it up I often hide sensory toys under the balls as well as other little gems, however it doesn’t take him long to start flapping or waving his hand around to move the balls before finding something.

It’s these sorts of activities that make me understand what T is going through when he watches me and other babies. He’s taking everything in, soaking it all up. When I think about what he was like even a month ago, it makes me realise that I take what I’ve learnt for granted. Walking, talking, etc. has all been learnt over time , and slowly but surely, he’s doing it as well. It’s really an amazing sight.

K